12/7/08

Two Months

I just opened this blog and realized it has been two months since my last posting. I apologize to my vast network of adoring fans. May all three of you forgive me for my negligence.

Life goes on in my little tiny corner of the world (is it a corner or is it just a tiny spec in the middle of the room?) Since October, I have witnessed an election, a holiday with another one approaching and the neverending drama of the "simple" life on the farm.

As most people know, I have developed an incredible passion for my dogs and the breed they represent. They are "AMERICAN Bulldogs". What is that you may ask? Well, as best I can tell it's any kind of bulldog except a pitbull rolled and bred into a package of bulldog that doesn't really look like any other bulldog. There are different varieties of the breed and it usually consists of a wonderful mix of english bulldog and boxer. They are bigger than the english but equally ugly but they are not as hyper and unresponsive to discipline as the boxers tend to be. My guys are huge at this point. From the tiny little packages I fed bottles every hour on the hour or everytime they whined to the remaining two weighing in at a good 60 pounds some 8 months later! They have each chosen to "own" other members of my family preferring to visualize me as their mother and provider and normally as the person they trip up during our long walks. However, being their mother seems to also label me as their protector which is the reverse of what I intended.

One evening last week, I was walking to open the gate for my husband as he came home from work. I do this for him because I am the greatest wife in the universe and as the greatest wife in the universe, I don't want him to have to get out and get wet or cold when coming through the gate! I like walks after dark - looking at the stars, seeing what phase the moon is in, listening to the sounds that only are heard at night. But, I am learning that there are other creatures as well who like walking after dark and the advice and warnings of my old farmer neighbor are beginning to ring true. "Do not walk after dark - it's dangerous" he tells me, knowing I am hard headed and love nothing more than a walk through the woods under a full moon when I can see and hear the lifeforms coming alive that I don't even know exist during the day.

On this particular evening it was raining and I had only an umbrella and our cat AJ to keep me company. The dogs don't come out when it rains...they will get their pretty white fur wet and they will get chilled. So, I left the babies behind in the warmth and safety of their little spot while I walked to open the gate. It was a warm rain and I enjoyed hearing it on the umbrella and feeling it on my face. AJ didn't seem to mind either.

I got to the gate some 200 yards from the house and waited for Dave to come up the hill of our dirt road. And I heard him...panting, huffing, puffing...it had to be Brutus....yaaaay...he came after all. He came around the far fence, rounded the corner and I could tell by the sound that he was on a mission but what a strange pant and huffing he was making. "Brutus, what on earth is the matter?" I asked him while AJ ran under my feet.

He got closer....

"Brutus, slow down....what are you so excited about" I asked again.

It was dark, no moon because of the rain clouds and Brutus was not slowing down. As I leaned forward to ask him again what his problem was, I realized this MAY NOT be Brutus!

I began backing to the now opened gate and asking Brutus to slow down as I could not see him. AJ continued to clammer under my feet making it very difficult to get anywhere without tripping. As he got another few feet and about 15 feet in front of me, I realized that Brutus was not Brutus but a full grown, rather angry and annoyed wild boar! I also realized I heard Dave coming up that hill.

As I clammered to get on top of the gate, the headlights began to reveal that my assessment was correct and this boar, who I have now named after a certain schizophrenic individual I have had the occasion to know, was coming straight towards me. I am not sure if it was the shaking umbrella or the approaching headlights that caused her to take a hard right turn and head into the woods, but I am sure that my neighbor was correct and there will be no more walking in the woods at night. If she wants to rule the dark, it's all hers!

Oh and those huge bulldogs bred and designed to assist and protect me....they are none worse for the wear having never shown up to defend their poor mother!

1 comment:

Nancy M. said...

Oh, that is scary! I have heard there are wild boar here too, among other things. I don't go very far from my house at night without someone with me. I have been known to be called a chicken! I am not ashamed. Sorry your walks are being stopped by the nightlife.